


Unfated

by Starbroken



Category: Mawaru Penguindrum
Genre: M/M, One Shot, One-Sided Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-31
Updated: 2012-05-31
Packaged: 2017-11-06 10:36:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/417895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starbroken/pseuds/Starbroken
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Passing curiosity maybe or possibly an exception? In the end it doesn't matter, because whatever he does Yamashita is still in love with Shouma and he intends to pursue this feeling no matter what. (Yamashita POV on Shouma and his feelings for him)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unfated

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Wow, I have been sitting on this for weeks and weeks, but I really like the outcome. After the audio drama revelations about Yamashita's affections I just had to put the spotlight on his crush a bit. Writing this was a lot of fun, I'm playing with the thought of writing a sequel or maybe a YamaShou fic of it own. Because of this I'd really appreciate hearing your thoughts about this piece of work. Thanks a lot and enjoy!

„ _Yamashita? Hmh... I guess, if I had to categorize him he'd be a friend. He's around me pretty often and we hang out at times. He can be really obnoxious though..._

_I've never thought about it further..."_

* * *

Sometimes when Yosuke Yamashita lay awake at night he wondered what it would be like to have Shouma Takakura right next to him, breathing slowly in his sleep. It had him breaking out into small giggles at times and at other times he just wanted to cry into his pillow.

Yamashita knew that this wasn't what his teenage life was supposed to be like. He should find a nice girl, a girl with a fine body preferably and go out with her, do grown-up-things and have tons of fun. Instead he was just sitting in his room, pretending his friend was gay for him.

But who could really blame him? The yearbook class photography proved it perfectly. Slim hips, delicate fingers, long eyelashes... When it came down to looks Shouma beat every girl with ease.

There was no way Yamashita wouldn't be staring every time he walked by. There was no way he couldn't try and use every opportunity to get his hands on that pretty body, over and over. What had been casual touches at first developed into full-on groping over the years. Shouma never really succeeded in pushing him away, so maybe he didn't really want to, didn't really try, right? Right?

Yamashita let out a loud sigh and stretched his arms in a wide movement. It was 1 am, he wasn't the slightest bit tired and his thoughts were going wild. It'd really be best to not go in detail further, the walls were thin and his little sister was home.

He tip-toed into the kitchen and got himself a glass of water. Then he melodramatically dropped himself down on a chair, feet landing on another. "Aw, damn, forgot to study for the test...", he grumbled to himself as he stared at the clock, but then he decided that learning now wouldn't make much sense either. An excuse for laziness, but he didn't mind. He was a teenager, of course his mind was set on other things than  _frog_  reproduction! Unlike Tabuki-sensei nobody in the class seemed to think it was very important at all.

The clock tic-toced unnervingly and despite flipping through some magazines Yamashita found nothing to do. He should probably go to bed after all. 1:26am wasn't the time to fool around.

With a jump he got back into his bed, hugging the pillow close. "Soon, Lil' Takakura... Seduction scheme #3.19 is bound to work on you~!"

The pillow responded with silence. Probably much like the real Shouma would have, had he known.

* * *

The test went badly, but Yamashita hadn't gotten his hopes up at all. The lessons went by, information going in at one ear and out at the other. He was going to ask Shouma out today, once again. Not like Shouma would know he meant a date though. It wasn't that easy.

He could hardly just walk up to him, love letter in hand and expect them to get with each other. Besides, Yamashita was clearly a tad more manly than Shouma. It was only natural that Shouma should come to him! 'I'm right here, all my special feelings reserved for you!'

Sometimes it took a bit of effort to not just jump out of his seat and scream it out loud - in the middle of class.

Thank goodness Yamashita was a calm and collected boy, yes, that he was-

"AAAAAAAH, why do I have to have cleaning duty today? Can't you wipe the blackboard for me? Just this once? Can you? Pretty please?"

His classmate stared with a deadpan expression as Yamashita flailed, waving his arms around dramatically.

"I've heard enough of that from you for a lifetime. You can do you duty at least once, sheesh."

Yamashita was left with the sponge in hand and Tabuki-sensei smiling at him. For a moment he just wanted to hit his head against the wall, but then he retreated to wiping the blackboard as he was told.

Catching up with Shouma was quite a bit of work, but luckily Yamashita had had three years of training already.

"Heeeeeey, Lil' Takakuraaaa!"

Screaming his lungs out, taking step after step, fast and little at first and then feathery almost-jumps the moment Shouma started to turn around. It had become quite the routine by now.

"Wanna get some tea?"

Yamashita didn't even wait with his invitation until he was next to Shouma, instead blurted it out as he was just in his last jumps.

"I met a cute girl at work!"

The follow-up was routine, too. Yamashita wasn't entirely sure why he did it every time. It wasn't a lie either. The girl was adorable, but as Yamashita leaned in to take a close look at Shouma's face once again the only thought he had was 'Her lashes could never compete with his, neither could her skin...'

"Sorry, I'm in a hurry today..."

Shouma smiled apologetically and for a second Yamashita wondered if just kidnapping him right here and now would be not so bad an idea after all.

It was so easy to fling his arms around him...

"Whaaaaaat? You're so cold to me!"

Before Shouma could even react he was caught by Yamashita's embrace and had his face nuzzled affectionately... and maybe a tad obnoxiously.

'That's what you get for rejecting me', Yamashita thought with a mental pout, 'I could be so much softer, if you let me... you'd like it~'

Shouma smelled good, too. Who had allowed this boy to be so much more beautiful than any girl Yamashita had met? It just wasn't fair!

"Your bro would definitely come along to see girls who show their belly button..."

With the girls again. Yamashita let his hand travel lower, not low enough to be dirty, but close enough to be worth the action. Teenage hormones, maybe. Or 'true love'? No teen mag he'd read could really give an answer.

Yamashita wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying anymore, it didn't matter. Girls, comparisons to the other Takakura twin (who was nothing like Shouma, not at all)... the usual stuff.

He was abruptly ripped apart from his dreamy thoughts though as Shouma grabbed his collar and brutally yanked him away.

"Don't lump me in with Kamba!"

It was amazing how furious this could make him. Yamashita would have to lie if he said he hadn't hoped for this, somewhere deep down. Only when Shouma was angry he got so close to Yamshita's face (kissably, couldn't he close the distance already?) and actually touched him instead of just shoving him away. And as a bonus the furious Shouma looked amusingly cute. 'My kingdom for a camera', Yamashita giggled in his mind.

This was dangerous though, the closeness was dangerous and-

"Oooh, girls from Ohka High! Did you see the chick in the middle? She's fine!"

At various occasions Yamashita had tried to develop a real interest in one of those girls, but he never really succeeded. By now they were just a distraction method (and Shouma would probably look even better in their uniform, too). Girls were a safe subject. Because he really, really wasn't supposed to be kissing his classmate out on the open street.

One of the girls he'd randomly started ogling turned her head.

"Oh! She turned around!"

He gave his voice an exited note. A normal teenage boy wouldn't waste a thought on not going to have a tea with a friend after all.

"She's staring at us...", Shouma sighed, obviously embarrassed about his classmate.

Yamashita made a playboy pose. "No, she's looking at me! I wonder what grade she's in..."

'Come on, Lil' Takakura, get a tiny bit jealous, will you? Look at me, how I don't need you at all..'

"Oh, look at the short-haired one next to her is hot, too. Don't you agree, Lil' Takakura~?"

Set in motion Yamashita found his mouth completely unable to stop. Staring after the girls, he wondered if it wouldn't be a lot easier to  _actually_  be attracted to one of them, instead of babbling on and on about it.

When he turned around Shouma was already gone. Instantly all tension dropped from Yamashita's muscles, and his arms hung limply at his side.

At least Shouma had absolutely no interest in these girls either. It was a tiny bit of solace.

On his way home Yamashita stopped by a Konbini and flipped through some magazines. Pin-up shots of models on every page. They were sexy, he had to admit, but who was he kidding? That wouldn't do for him. None of those would.

"Aaaargh, why is this so complicated?"

Yamashita frantically ran his hands through his hair, as he stormed home. Three years of being after Shouma Takakura and he hadn't learned a thing.

* * *

YOSUKE

-Three Years Ago

-West Garden Junior High School • Assembly Hall

*On that day I first caught sight of him. Nothing made sense anymore from that moment on

"Whoa, you're twins? You don't look a thing like twins!"

Yamashita stared at his new classmates with wide eyes. Blue and red hair. He'd never have even guessed they were related.

"That's because we're not alike at all...", the blue-haired boy rolled his eyes. His brother grinned. "Right, right, Shouma here is much more of a housewife than I could ever be..."

Yamashita laughed at the mortified expression the blue-haired brother gave.

At that day he had no idea that this moment his future as a teenage boy had been decided.

* * *

'It's not that I'm gay!', Yamashita suddenly thought as he let his schoolbag drop on the floor and slipped out of his shoes. It was probably the 38th time he had make the same decision, but this one felt a bit more final.

'It's not like I'm gay. It's just that I'm madly in love with the Lil' Takakura!'

Or maybe in lust? Maybe it was hormones? Maybe it would stop? No, not this again. Yamashita kicked the door shut.

'Love' just seemed more like it. It had been three years that a girl had last interested him and back then he had been 13. Ever since then they had just looked pretty to him, but that was it. Who was he even kidding? Shouma Takakura was who he wanted.

His talk about girls was just camouflage. It came naturally to him. Reassure himself he was normal, make Shouma jealous or maybe just reassure himself that Shouma wasn't like that, wasn't a playboy like Kamba, that he had a chance to be with him for real? Yamashita couldn't really tell the reasons and he didn't bother to go and figure himself out. That'd be pretty exhausting and probably not so useful.

Shouma always assumed that Yamashita never got a girlfriend because he was such a blunt idiot at times, but that wasn't it. It was that Yamashita stopped seriously chasing the moment none of his classmates, especially Shouma, was around to see.

* * *

YOSUKE

-Three Years Ago

-Yamashita Residence • Living Room

*That moment I really lost my mind, Destiny was decided then and there

Presentations were the most boring thing on the planet and preparing them when it was lovely weather outside bordered into torture. Who had invented something like this? How was he even supposed to concentrate for a second? He was only 13 once after all and there were a ton of things he'd rather do than this!

At least the little Takakura was his project partner, so that was something. Tons better than some of the other guys in class. He got along with the Takakuras quite well and it was nice to get the chance to hang out like this. Shouma was apparently trying to wrap his head around the schoolbook's content, but Yamashita could tell he was getting more and more frustrated by the second. He could practically make a countdown until Shouma put the pen aside and sighed, stretching himself. "Argh... this is driving me crazy..."

Yamashita nodded eagerly. "Isn't it? So come on, let's do something else already, I'm dying of boredom!"

"Yeah... because you haven't actually been doing anything", Shouma grumbled, but he couldn't really disagree. This was dead boring and maybe a break would do them some good. He didn't really count on getting Yamashita's help afterwards, but at least he could cool down his own aching head.

Yamashita smiled brightly and began listing all sorts of activities they could rather spent the day with then homework. "Okay! Video games, football, movies..."

"..you had all that planned out from the start hadn't you?"

Yamashita couldn't deny, so he shrugged innocently, amused at Shouma's expression.

An hour later they hadn't progressed a single bit in their presentation. "Dang, I don't get this..." Yamashita let himself drop on Shouma in an awkward angle, throwing away the video game remote. "How can you be so good at this?"

"A-ah, get off me!", Shouma shoved him away a bit, sitting up again, "I don't know, I don't do anything special, okay?"

Unlike Yamashita he didn't seem to be very impressed with his own skills. Instead he just rolled his eyes and waited for his friend to finally get away from him.

Draped over Shouma's shoulder Yamashita found himself confronted with a very close up view on Shouma's eyes. 'Whoa, real pretty!', he thought to himself, leaning in even more. The eyelashes were long and dark, fluttering softly as Shouma blinked. 'Hmmmmhhh... strange. Really looks like a chick, the Lil' Takakura...'

"Uh..."

Then again, did it come as much of a surprise? Those shoulders were far from manly as well...

"Uuuhm... H-hey."

Yamashita recalled noticing something like this before. Yes, it had been about seven weeks earlier maybe, when he found himself staring at Shouma's figure as the walked past on his way home. So this wasn't anything new.

"GET AWAY FROM ME ALREADY!"

Shouma almost violently pushed Yamashita away and ultimately off the sofa where he remained for a moment, looking a bit like a frog that had been stomped on.

"... that huuuuuurt, Lil' Takakura."

"It's your own fault, really."

After accompanying Shouma to the metro station Yamashita mused thoughtfully. He'd had crushes before, so he could tell exactly how it felt. Just that those had been girls and that he never really got the chance to observe their looks so up close. In that way crushing on Shouma would be almost an advantage- Wait, what was he thinking here?

He was obviously straight! Crushing on a boy was out of question all together! And it wasn't like he really was... 'Passing bi-curiousity' sounded good. Perfect justification.

Satisfied with himself Yamashita went to get diner.

* * *

It was getting dark outside when Yamashita had finally finished cleaning the shop at his part-time job. He pushed the last chairs back to their places and grabbed his back. Today had turned out to be such a failure. Failed test, next to no Shouma and even more work than usual. The teen let out a loud and exasperated sigh as he walked down the empty street.

"Man… I'm really tired of waiting…"

He didn't just want to imagine what being Shouma's boyfriend would feel like. It never turned out right either way. No matter how he turned it, Yamashita was pretty sure that Shouma would never just kiss him for treating him to diner or anything like that. No romance movie made a good template for thinking up their possible relationship. But if anything that made it more exiting to Yamashita.

"Ack… I'm getting ahead of myself again…", Yamashita scratched his head. But he had plans. If Shouma wasn't going to be baited by the simple things, then he might have to put more and more effort into it.

It was this easy and then again it absolutely wasn't. Still, Yamashita was in love with Shouma. He didn't waste a single thought on fate, but when it came down to it he would try and fight it in order to be with his chosen one.

* * *

_If the red string doesn't connect you and I,_

_Then what shoould I do?_

_But it doesn't make a difference at all_

_Because I will always try to get you all tangled up with me_

_No matter what, I can absolutely not give up_

_Pushing through with this love I get all caught up myself_

_Running until I'm out of breath, laughing until my chest hurts_

_I will definitely get a hold on your hand when it all comes to an end_


End file.
